Today I had the opportunity of riding on a speedboat.
It was fun.
The air was cool, the sky was beautiful, and for a moment I had a glimpse of what it would be like to live by the sea.
A goal of mine.
I really hope to someday have a career that I can do on my own time, make a good profit, and have so many hours to just reflect on life, read a book, or sleep in. I keep picturing my ideal Seaside home. Hopefully I'll get there.
Hopefully sooner rather than later because I'm getting sick. Too much stress. I feel it in the center of my chest when I breathe. I wake up and wonder "why" and have to force myself to go on about my day. The worst days are when I don't have to force myself out of bed. On those days, I am just a shadow of who I was on brighter days. My actions are due to cells remembering daily functions. I have no feelings and no mood on those days.
I have taken another work day off. I will rest and spend time with family. I should feel selfish or guilty because I usually do when I call off. But I feel like never going back. I will try to enjoy this day off. If I don't, this sickness will grow and follow me around making my moods and behaviors unpredictable.
Ego depletion.
SO for now, I shall think about my home by the sea.
It was fun.
The air was cool, the sky was beautiful, and for a moment I had a glimpse of what it would be like to live by the sea.
A goal of mine.
I really hope to someday have a career that I can do on my own time, make a good profit, and have so many hours to just reflect on life, read a book, or sleep in. I keep picturing my ideal Seaside home. Hopefully I'll get there.
Hopefully sooner rather than later because I'm getting sick. Too much stress. I feel it in the center of my chest when I breathe. I wake up and wonder "why" and have to force myself to go on about my day. The worst days are when I don't have to force myself out of bed. On those days, I am just a shadow of who I was on brighter days. My actions are due to cells remembering daily functions. I have no feelings and no mood on those days.
I have taken another work day off. I will rest and spend time with family. I should feel selfish or guilty because I usually do when I call off. But I feel like never going back. I will try to enjoy this day off. If I don't, this sickness will grow and follow me around making my moods and behaviors unpredictable.
Ego depletion.
SO for now, I shall think about my home by the sea.
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